Being in my mid-20s, I’m at the stage in life where a lot of my peers are settling down. It feels like almost every day I see a new Facebook post announcing an engagement or pregnancy. I’ve noticed a lot of my fellow single ladies lamenting over all the weddings in particular. ‘When is it going to be my turn?’ they ask, while drowing their sorrows in wine and ice cream. The thing is, I don’t really feel that way. While it would be lovely to meet my person and live happily ever after, I’m not in a rush. Honestly, if it happens it happens. If not I really don’t mind being single. What I do spend my time being envious over is the babies.
I know I want to be a mom, partnered or not. The idea of single motherhood by choice doesn’t even really scare me. The problem is, it’s just not the right time in my life yet to embark on that journey. My ready in almost every way, but my bank account just isn’t there yet. It’s hard to come to peace with that fact, when you want something so desperately.
This evening I came across the profile of a little girl who was just listed for adoption. She turns 2 in May, has downs syndrome and is absolutely adorable. The headline of the posting read ‘Could you be her Mama?’ Yes, yes I could. I could see myself bringing this sweet girl home. If there was any possible way I could make it happen, I would in a heartbeat. But I’m not there, and I need to try to make peace with that.